My Qualified Report on Men

When I was a little boy I had a really hard time refraining from being a jerk. I mean, it was a natural reaction, you know? Boys are programmed to constantly do stupid things that go against all reason. It wasn't even my fault that I kept hurting other people, it was my parents fault for creating a boy instead of a girl. It's a masculine instinct to act before thinking and to not consider consequences. All men who think before they act were trained over years and years to operate in that manner. Unfortunately, it takes a lot of work to fight against manly nature. I know this because I have experienced it first hand.

I always envied girls and their ability to be naturally better people. Like all the other boys, I secretly wished that I could have been born a girl. What a life that could have been.

As a man, I know what boys must go through in order to become the people we were meant to be. I know it's hard, guys, but it's the right thing to do. I can feel your pain because I've been there. And believe me, it doesn't matter what you're thinking or feeling now. You have to fight it, everyday. We can become better people. We can be just as good as girls if we try.

On behalf of all guys, I apologize for being despicable human beings. I know we've let the world down and that jerks like us are the reason for world hunger and poverty. I urge you, men, to put yourselves down constantly and consider yourself less than others as you strive to be as good as a woman.

This is all, of course, completely invalid, seeing as I am a girl, who grew up with only sisters, and didn't speak to boys that I wasn't related to until I was like 10. I have no first hand experience with growing up as a male and the different joys and challenges that may bring. Although I've heard about boys, seen boys, known boys, been friends with boys, and been nurtured by my father and my grandfather, I have no authority to speak on what it may be like to be a boy. I'm sure that boys who read this will feel misrepresented and possibly offended by the words I have used to generalize their gender. What a shame.

The sole purpose of this picture was to get you to click on the link. Thanks, Zac.

There are so many topics and issues that people feel qualified to speak on and that is exceptionally unfortunate. We all have the freedom of speech and the right to say what we want. However, just because you can speak doesn't mean you always should speak.

I think that everyone should share their thoughts and insights because everyone sees the world through their own lens. By comparing and discussing views, we all become more educated. Everyone should feel encouraged to share their stories and life lessons and perspectives. For example, I can feel confident sharing my thoughts and experiences with depression because that is something I have dealt with in my own life. My friends could share what it was like to have a friend experience depression, but not necessarily what it is like to actually have depression. I can share what it was like growing up in the 90's, because I did. My parent's could share what it was like raising kids in the 90's, but would not have authority to speak on what it was like being a child in the 90's. My sister could share what it is like to live with a severely allergy to wheat, because that is something she personally deals with. I could share what it is like to have a sister who struggles with severe food allergies, but I cannot talk with full authority on what having a severe food allergy is like. Ya feel me?

If you listen to me talk about the personal experiences I have to share, and I listen to you talk about the personal experiences you have to share, then we both gain the knowledge of a personal experience. If I project something onto your experience that is not true, I'm an idiot and you're offended and possibly even hurt. So, in an effort to (a) not be idiots and (b) not hurt others, let's not try and be experts on things that we don't actually know about, folks.

You are a font of information. Just not on everything.

7 Things My Struggle With Depression Taught Me

1. Don't let other people determine your worth. You alone have the right, and also the responsibility, of placing worth on yourself and your life. The fact that this person or that person doesn't talk to you as much as you want them to or that you're always overshadowed by your older sibling has no bearing on how much value you have. I mean, you could let that be the measure by which you judge your self-worth, but it's a stupid way to measure it. 
   
2. Don't let your happiness depend on something you may lose. Whether that's a job, a house, your prized shoe collection, or your relationship. It's unfair to yourself because whatever you're depending on could be taken from you and leave your life in ruins. It's also unfair to whatever you are placing the huge responsibility of your life's happiness on. Your shoes don't know how to handle that. They can't possibly be responsible for that big of a thing. Same goes for people. You can't have a friend or significant other be the foundation of your joy. You are setting them up for failure which will not only crush you but will also give them tremendous guilt that isn't warranted. Just don't do it. 
   
3. The person who needs to be happy with your life is you. Not your parents or your teachers or your friends. You. If you're making choices and doing things based on what other people want, it's easy to end up questioning if your life is really all that valuable. It may seem valuable in someone else's eyes, but they're not the ones who need to wake up every morning and live it. Make choices you are happy with, do things that are valuable in your eyes, and the ones who truly love you will accept that you gotta do what you gotta do. It's not easy to live a life that you don't even like. Build a life that you actually enjoy living.
   
   And by the same token:
4. You can do whatever the heck you want to with your life. If you're unhappy with something, just change it. Life is not a game you need to win and there is no slot that you have to fit in to. You are young, always. There is always more time to change it up and do whatever you want. It's your life and you have that liberty. You have no set rules to follow about what you can or cannot do with your life. You can do what you want and be who you want. To not do it is a waste of your time.
   
5. Have a variety of things happening in your life. Instead of focusing all your time and energy on one or two areas in your life, cultivate a well-rounded roster of activities and friend groups. Spending time developing and nurturing a wide variety of friendships and interests brings so much health and balance to your life.  

   

   OMGSH FRIENDS?!

6. Say no to things that are bad for you. Unhealthy relationships are poison to your soul. Take a step back from that one friendship that always brings you down and allow yourself to be free from it's grasp. Just say no, kids. It's not worth it. 



Ugh Britney, JUST SAY NO. 

7. Sometimes other people, even smart people, don't have the answer. Growing up, kids can always trust an adult to tell them what they should be doing. Parents and teachers always tell us what to do next. But there will come a time when you'll look around for directions and your parents may not have the answer for you. Sometimes, no one can tell you what your next step is. Sometimes, you need to depend on yourself and you have to decide what to do. So don't let people trick you into thinking that they have your answers, and don't look for your answer in other people. 

   

   Jks we really don't ever know.